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Monday, 9 February 2009

Microsoft and cars

I don't know how true this is.

At a recent computer conference (COMDEX) Bill Gates, the founder of Microsoft, is reported to have compared the computer industry with the auto industry: "If General Motors had kept up with technology like the computer industry has," he said, "we would all be driving 25-dollar cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response, General Motors have issued the following press release …

"If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1 For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash … twice a day

2 Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car

3 Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this

4 Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine

5 Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads

6 The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light

7 The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying

8 Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna

9 Every time a new car was introduced. car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car

10 You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off

Thanks to the grumpy old sod for this.

I'm sorry again

I'm afraid I watched the BBC news tonight.

The main news item was the terrible fires in Australia. What I couldn't stomach, is that they had to parade a weather expert in to inform us that it was Global warming that caused it. We were told like naughty schoolboys that there would be more disasters caused by global warming in the future.

What utter Bollocks. Australia has had bush fires every year since records begun, notwithstanding that some of these fires maybe have been the work of arsonists.

With all that hot air from the Beeb they should shut up and save the world.

They don't make me feel safe.

This morning I went to get my paper. On returning to my home, I reflected how things had changed over the years. This thought was prompted by taking out my keys to unlock the front door. I can't remember when I was a kid, ever seeing a door locked. How things have changed.

My house has two locks on the front door, three on the back one, all the downstairs windows have security devices, and there is an alarm fitted.Which brings me to the point in question.

Where has the visual policing gone?

Only a few years ago, the village had it's own Bobby, Kevin by name, and 6' 2" tall. Kevin used to walk round the village, passing the day with anyone he met, always on the move. Even in the high street of the nearest town, you could not help to bump into at least one Policeman, during the course of a few minutes.

Then came the rationalisation (Cuts) in the force. (Sorry again, service I should have said).

Nowadays the only police you are likely to see are those that dash past in their police cars, going where, is anyones guess.

God help you though, if you do meet up with one of these creatures. I popped into a petrol station a few weeks ago. When I came out from paying, I was confonted by a tall, shaven headed individual, that was attired in dark blue, festooned with menacing looking objects, and a completely humour free demeanour.

I was asked, "Please get in the back of the Police car, Sir". I dread to think what would have happened if I'd said "NO". He was so Completely devoid of any interpersonal skills, that I think he'd have called up his mates and had me locked away under the 42 day rule. Throughout my little interview, locked in the back of the Police car, I was made to feel like an axe murderer.

That little incident has made me wary, if not somewhat scared, of approaching any member of our so called police service. I really felt threatened at the time. No wonder the Government has had to bring in CCTV and PCSOs'. (I will rant about the uselessness of PCSOs' another time.)

It's about time the police got out and related with the public they serve. They might find that with our help they would catch a few criminals.


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H/T to Old Holborn